40. How to Discover What You Want & Actually Ask For It

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Get your first Book of the Month book for $5 plus a free hat of your choosing with code HOLLY: https://www.bookofthemonth.com/?utm_source=Partner&utm_medium=Social&utm_campaign=DecemberI believe desire is a map & we can start using it to actually improve our relationships with others WHILE seeing our dream life come into our physical reality!! RESOURCES MENTIONED: A Woman's Guide to Power Unbound: https://www.kasiaurbaniak.com/unbound-bookLittle Weirds by Jenny Slate: https://www.thejennyslate.com/little-weirdsPleasure Activism: https://adriennemareebrown.net/book/pleasure-activism/RELATED EPISODES: Watch this if you're ready to rethink romantic relationships: https://youtu.be/olzuQmLQlSQ?si=T6BJ_SX340AQK9uVHow to be a better villager: https://youtu.be/-cNpV9SL6OQ?si=Ib-dv2Y-s3PaQEBg📓 Anna's Substack Newsletter ⛅ Wild Geese Instagram 💌 Anna's Podcast Production Services Watch on Youtube To inquire about potential collaborations, please email hello@annacorinneproductions.comThis episode is sponsored by Book of the Month00:00 intro 01:00 Book of the Month Sponsorship 02:54 How are Desires Different than Goals? 04:54 How can we be ready to answer the question "What do you want?" 05:11 the low maintenance, chill persona is a myth06:25 the most radical thing a woman can do is want07:33 desires about being desired 08:16 You don't choose your desires, your desires choose you08:32 How do we even know what we want?12:51 A prompt to translate desires into asks15:00 Making your asks more specific17:50 Asking for the wrong thing is just information18:11 Satisfying your desires is a highly personal process18:46 Redefining what it means to ask for help 19:53 Maladaptive behaviors we might use to avoid asking for what we want20:22 Yearning can feel like a humiliation ritual21:09 Having conviction in your desires 23:10 How rejection can actually lead to a better outcome24:30 Why I reject wantlessness25:35 How desire can be an empowering community builder27:35 What is pleasure activism? 28:48 Why we all need to talk about what we