Apologizing Doesn't Make You Weak. Doing It Wrong Does

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So let’s talk about apologies. Not the awkward, forced ones, but real apologies in leadership and at work. A few days ago, I had a tough conversation with a colleague—I was rude, and I knew it. In that moment, apologizing felt like putting myself out there. Isn’t saying “I’m sorry” supposed to make a boss look weak?This question actually came up at my book event for Beneath the Leadership Infrastructure. It stuck with me, because for years, apologizing in the workplace was painted as a weakness, especially for women. You hold the line, you never apologize, you keep that “boss” energy at all costs. But what does that do to trust? What does it feel like to work with a boss who’s never wrong, never sorry?The episode dives into why apologies can actually be a strong show of leadership instead of a weakness. There are three classic traps to watch for: the leader who never apologizes and creates an environment of fear and corridor gossip; the performative apologizer, who says all the right things but makes no changes, eroding credibility; and the constant apologizer, often seen with women, apologizing for simply asking questions or taking up space, sending the signal of uncertainty.A genuine apology is completely different. We talk through examples—admitting when you’re wrong, actually holding yourself accountable, and following words with actions. It builds trust with your team and sets the foundation for a healthier culture.But you should never overdo it. If you’re apologizing every five minutes, that’s a behavior check. Use apologies when you mean them, not as a reflex. True leadership isn’t about never being wrong—it’s about taking ownership and making things right.If you’ve ever wondered how to handle mistakes at work, whether apologies really cost you authority, or how to find that balance between humility and self-confidence, this episode is for you.Chapters:00:00 Introduction—apologies and leadership mindset01:41 When apologizing goes wrong: never apologizing, performative apologies, and constant apologizing04: